HI There,
lol, 
Seems as though it’s YOU that’s having the problem, I know how the ESP32 SPI busses work, they are NOT all the same PERIOD. I Have demos on here to prove that .It’s easy for folks to get confused when in some cases GPIO’s vs. PIN numbers can be switched.
The CS or SS can and is defined when not using the canned spi interface.
You should have a read of this link it will educate you on the subject maybe clear up the confusion you have.
HTH
GL 
PJ 
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